Over the past months I’ve written half a dozen really depressing posts about mass shootings, presidential elections, etc–but never finished any of them & lost interest in trying to articulate something I was being bombarded with from all directions via social media. Growing up without the internet, I never really heard that many opinions or thoughts. I had the news, my family, the local library and Encyclopedia Britannica. All of these combined never seemed too much to sift through. My mom allowed us two books to check out at the library, and at least one of mine was always a how-to book on gymnastics (why I didn’t qualify for Rio I’ll never know).
It takes me awhile to process things. I think it should take everyone time to process things. But in our world today, you are late to the party if you have to take time to think. If you haven’t changed your profile picture, shared an article, or written your own thoughts for the world to see within 24 hours of any given event–well, onto the next. My response is silence because social media does not feel like the platform for me to engage in productive conversation. And then there are negative posts about people being silent! Darn it, I can’t hide anywhere without people having thoughts about what I should be feeling, doing, being, believing, saying, etc.
“Everyone has an opinion,” I sigh, realizing how silly it is for ME to be annoyed–I mean, I’ve been writing my opinions on this site for over a decade without too much thought about how anyone receives it or perceives it. It’s a self-indulgent place for me, I mean–hello, the website is named after MY OWN SELF. These conflicting thoughts are what keep me from writing, but then I think–hey, haven’t I mostly been writing super boring posts about my latest triathlon? Who cares if I’m a contradiction? Aren’t we all?
So I’m here again. Writing dumb indulgent things that help me process the world and share a piece of myself that doesn’t reveal itself through my daily conversation. So, summertime thoughts:
1) The saddest part of our dog walks: The usual route of my dog walks/runs with Huxley takes us down the street past a house where Pickles the dog lives. He hangs out behind the gate of a driveway–wrought iron, so we see through it. Huxley comes up to Pickles, sniffs him and says hello, pees on a nearby bush & we are on our way. For a month or more now, Pickles is not outside. I was hopeful at first–maybe it’s too hot out? Maybe he’ll be out on the weekend? But I’m starting to think we won’t see Pickles again. Adding to the pain, Huxley still stops in that spot & cries for him. We are still both very hopeful as we near the driveway, and we’re both let down a little when he’s not there. Sure being outdoors and in nature is peaceful and beautiful and fun, but sometimes it’s a little heartbreaking, too. I really still hope we see Pickles soon.
2) My birthday is on Monday! I have been so busy this summer teaching at summer camp & lots of business gigs, so I haven’t thought much about it or planned anything. But I LOVE my birthday. Mostly I feel so lucky to be here another year, and I can’t believe the fun adventures and crazy paths my life has taken. This life is SO SHORT, and time flies by–I sometimes wish my 20s lasted for 20 years just so I could have more time to learn how to navigate life a little more smoothly. I’m not 40 for a couple more years, but I feel it getting closer & of course it’s shocking because I don’t think anyone who turns 40 quite feels like an adult yet. But 40 SOUNDS like you should have your stuff together, which I don’t! I had this thought yesterday, but then I just condensed my entire adult life into a sentence or two & turns out I’ve had a real cool time with lots of adventures–so I’m sticking to that story! Anyway, HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO ME!! It’s on a MONDAY (boo), so I’ll just be working all day.
3) You know it’s summer when Big Brother is on. It’s season 18, and yes–I’ve been watching since season 1. I still love it, though some of it is so predictable and painful, I’m sure that’s part of the reason I love it. What I love best is the sense of humor on the show. I mean, The Bachelor takes itself way too seriously–have you seen those rose ceremonies that drag on for at least 30 minutes and 4 commercial breaks? Big Brother is quick paced & has too many ZANY sound effects to count. Also, it has odd sponsors–like OUTBACK STEAKHOUSE. And sometimes Sheryl Crow will come and play in the backyard. Or the house guests get to screen an upcoming CBS show, and their reactions are way over the top & amazing–because they haven’t been able to watch anything for months. I love this show & I love my friends who love this show. It reminds me that it’s summer, so let’s be SILLY.
4) Did I tell you about the best road trip ever? I can’t believe I went on my summer vacation before summer started (first of June)–now I need another! But driving up to Northern California was SO beautiful. The trees are gigantic & the ocean majestic–found a little hidden spot called Shelter Cove that was right out of some horror movie. It looked like we were in Maine or something, old school beachy/woodsy neighborhood with population–a few hundred? I went to find one of the world’s best mountain bike trail (or so says a magazine article), and it did not disappoint. It was way harder than I prefer, but that’s what you drive 12 hours to do, right? Challenge yourself to a 4 hour long mountain bike trail with a section called “Prince of Pain.” OK, maybe that’s just me. It was thrilling, exhausting & beautiful! My mountain bike was so thankful for the adventure. Oooh–and the Black Sands Beach was truly unforgettable. HUGE beach filled with black rocks & dangerous ocean waters & very few people. It is quite a journey driving up that far, but it was worth every minute.
5) Weddings.For some reason, I have so many to attend this year–for my closest friends, and it makes me so happy! I love weddings!! For each one, I take the time and effort of picking out a dress so seriously as if I’m the one getting married. My best friend Chuck is getting married next weekend, and I’m SO happy for him! First off, being able to have a BEST friend for 20 years non-stop has been one of the big gifts in my life, and so anytime he is happy–I am happy! OK, I’m also happy because they will have a taco truck & are serving margaritas. Can’t wait!
OK, there’s some random information for you! Hopefully it didn’t overwhelm you as much as reading my Facebook Feed overwhelms me. Have a great summer, Love, Kristy