Hi! I’m back! I was such a mess after giving birth! I was a mess for a good 2 months, which they say is normal. It doesn’t feel normal. My anxiety was off-the-charts, and it took so long for my body to feel like my own again. I am finally able to workout, which has always been the biggest mood-booster for me. My dog is thankful we are shuffling along now. He can tell I’m at least TRYING to run again. And I could not feel “normal” again without the help of everyone around me–especially my family and friends who took care of Kenzy when I was either too exhausted, working, had appointments to go to or just needed a break.
Kenzy is truly adorable. This helps TONS when she’s a crying mess. I’ve already written about my so-so feelings about becoming a mom. I was scared it would change me into something I wouldn’t recognize anymore. I would be in drum circles with my baby, or I would do nothing in my spare time except read parenting books. Not that there is anything wrong with that, but it’s good to know I’m still so goofy & can make time to watch Big Brother and Housewives (priorities). I have dance parties with her to Beyonce (her lyrics are sometimes WAY inappropriate for 2 month olds, btw) where I force her to dance by moving her arms in legs in a ridiculous fashion & she totally cracks up. She makes me laugh, too, which is a gift. I don’t want to compare her to my dog, but I will–because they both have my heart & I’m lucky to have their love. I am such a planner, worrier, etc–but now I just go day-by-day because I can’t handle anything more than that. Turns out, it’s not so bad.
I made it back to work in time for summer camp, and I also somehow managed to keep scavenger hunts going throughout my entire maternity leave, the birth of the baby & those 2 months when I was a mess. We have one of our biggest ones to date coming up in a couple of weeks–a 3 hour hunt through Downtown L.A., and I’m happy to say it still engages my creativity & challenges me in a good way. I don’t know what the future holds in terms of balancing mom life with work life, but I’m grateful to be able to work from home several days a week & get to spend that time with the neediest co-workers ever (Kenzy and Huxley). I also decided to take a break from it in August, so I can have some time at home where I’m not distracted with work.
The biggest joy is seeing other people love Kenzy. They say “she is beautiful, good job” to me as if I had anything to do with it. She gets to grow up with all this support, and I couldn’t ask for anything more for her. While they nurture her & buy her necessities & give her attention–I spend my time coming up with hilarious Halloween costume ideas for her. Thank GOODNESS she has a support crew.
OK, now back to triathlons! I haven’t raced in almost a year, and I’m itching to get back out there. I’ve got some work to do to get back into shape, so I’m shooting for an October/November race date. My road bike is so depressed, but don’t worry–I have taken it out for a ride & more to come! I’ve done squats with the baby, which about as “mommy and me” as I get. I’m trying to eat healthy, but I got so used to eating unhealthy during pregnancy (Wendy’s spicy chicken sandwich anyone?!?!) that it takes a minute to realize I shouldn’t eat like that anymore. I’m at the stage where I go out to a restaurant and at least THINK about ordering a salad. Perhaps another month or so, and I actually will!